Open Letters to Skye
A daughter's world of suffering and choice -
and the beauty found in choosing well.
Notes to Skye, and anyone learning to choose life.
Drugs and Social Settings
Dear Skye,
The topic of drugs and social settings will cross your path one day.
At some point, you may find yourself surrounded by a group of friends—or even just one friend—who is using substances while you share the same space with them. At first, there might be peer pressure and stories about how “drugs are cool,” or people trying to impress others by talking about their experiences taking drugs on university campus or on holidays to places like Thailand or Bali.
You might wonder:
Are these experiences worth experimenting with? And at what cost? Is it a cost you can truly afford?
In our family, we’ve seen how high that cost can be. My cousin struggled with his own demons and eventually could not bear them anymore. He took drugs and later died by suicide. That loss is real, and it lives quietly in the background of why I’m writing this to you.
I’m not going to analyse the pros and cons of psychedelics here. You can find all kinds of information and opinions on search engines and AI tools in your lifetime. Instead, I want to speak to the suffering underneath the choice.
When I think about people who use drugs socially—whether to experiment, to escape, or to chase another “state of mind”—I mostly feel sadness and empathy. What I see is not “coolness” but pain. Life includes suffering, and we need to recognise that as part of being human. When someone uses substances to step out of their own experience, they may be adding more suffering in the long term.
Often, the body remains here in this realm, while the mind tries to exist somewhere else. When mind and body become disconnected again and again, it can be harder to live fully in your own life. That disconnection can quietly deepen the pain they were trying to escape.
It also hurts to watch people I care about go down that road. Some of my relationships with others, across intertwined communities, involve drug use. On the outside, they may have beautiful families, business success, and the lifestyles they dreamed of. But none of that makes using drugs harmless or “okay.” I find myself asking hard questions:
Am I willing to keep standing in these circles?
Can I love them and still step back?
Is it kinder to myself to quietly let go?
These are not questions with easy answers. But they are questions worth asking.
Skye, you have one life in this body—just one life. Your time, attention, and consciousness are precious. Guard them carefully. Choose what truly supports your heart, your mind, and your body staying together.
No matter what shit you get into, I'm here for you just FYI. Always.
With love,
Mummy